Oscar
Jared lies on the floor to review the horrible game Oscar. Synopsis The video begins on an empty set. Jared throws his arms up from the ground and exclaims by cursing. What is this game? This company made some of the worst games of all time, and Oscar is one of the worst platformers Jared has ever played. Jared is lying down on the floor, and pushes the cartridge away from himself. He wonders why he played it. What kind of animal is Oscar? He has 90's attitude, because his hat is backwards. He's just Oscar. The story is that Oscar is in a movie theater, and there are four different sets to play in. Each level is set in different movie styles. The first level starts with a 69 joke. Some guy says... something. The goal is to collect the Oscars in each level. Jared realizes that this game is based on The Oscars. The music also sucks. The challenge of the game isn't about jumping and making it to the end, so it isn't really a platformer, Jared doesn't know what else to call it. And the platforming is so bad! There is no momentum, and the camera whips back and forth. Landing on an enemy is vomit inducing. Jared spits up. He moves around so fast. The platforms are inconsistent - some can be jumped through, others can't, even though they look exactly the same! The camera makes the game more frustrating. If the game was slowed down, and Oscar was moved to the center of the camera, the two biggest problems of the game would be solved. It still wouldn't make the game good. The gameplay is awful. The collectibles are vaguely based on their levels, and collecting them makes them explode into stars creating even more chaos. One of the power ups is a ball thingy that is kind of like a yo-yo, but Jared doesn't know what it is. Jared is still dying a lot - but he does get the checkpoint elephant! Even by having three hits, the player will still die a lot - and there are no continues! Jared couldn't get past stage 2! There are other terrible powerups. There is an item that slows Oscar down a lot. In any other game, this would suck, but here it is great! Slowing down makes the game more manageable! This powerdown is the best part of the game! The Game Boy is even better, as it makes everything green. The worst power up is the invisibility. You can't tell where you are when you are invisible - and you still get hurt by enemies. This power up gets rid of every other item you have! Jared finally figured out that the items reward the player points, but the game doesn't show the points until you beat the stage. Jared didn't pick these up at first because they showed no noticable effect. So why should Jared pick them up? They are required to beat the game, as the player gets extra lives based on these points. Since you die so frequently, you need all the lives you can get! Jared got so many lives that the life counter stayed at 9, and wouldn't go down. Jared needed every life for this game. Is that how they solved this problem? This isn't fun, and neither is dying all the time, and makes the player question their life decisions. That last part may just be Jared. Spelling letters for Bonus gives a short bonus level. It'll get a few more lives. The game becomes beatable at least. The game says more nonsense. The game plays like ass, and is too hard to control. The game design is the problem, and giving the player so many lives is not a good solution, and isn't fun. Jared doesn't know if he found a crack in the wall or some poop on a table. Jared slowly managed to beat each stage. Jared beat every part of every level, and the ending is dull. The final rating is a F*** you out of 10! Everything about this game works against the player. The controls are bizarre, the momentum is weird, and Oscar moves way too fast. Some of the power ups do nothing or make the game worse. The biggest offense is the camera whipping around all the time. The poor graphics make enemies blend in with the background, and death is something the player has to accept. That's dumb. The platforming is inconsistent. The ending is one big middle finger on the screen. The worst part is that they tried to bring Oscar back FOUR TIMES! In 2010, the game was re-released twice, and two new games were also made all on the DSi. Jared never will play those games! An outtake is shown of Jared spitting the water everywhere, hoping that it looked good, and not wanting to do another take! His shirt is all wet, and he says that this is why he has multiple shirts! Category:ProReview Category:Videos